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Thursday, September 19, 2002 ( 1:59 PM ) MaltaGirl Gifted ramblings... i am still confused by this whole gifts thing. I have always been a good teacher, so is what i have now just a natural talent / inclination being blessed by the spirit because i am obediently using it for his glory, or is it my actual gift of the spirit? or servanthood - i really had to work at it at first, and struggled with various associated issues like wanting praise - so is my serving just me being obedient to the Lord, or a natural inclination to it, or a genuine gift growing and flourishing? i remember that even as young as 12, i always stayed behind at events in the Girl Guides to help clear up the mess (although i generally managed to dissapear if dirty work had to be done) One of the people i stayed with in OK has the gift of servanthood, beyond all shadow of a doubt. Her husband described to me that she genuinely does not desire any kind of recognition, she just wants to serve and will do anything neccessary. is it just that my 'gift' is immature, that i am immature in its use, or that it is no gift at all? i think i remember someone saying that the gift of the spirit comes in its full power - i guess that means that someone doesn't need to develop the gift, but may need to learn to use it properly. Hmmm, now am i learning the appropriate attitudes i need for proper use of teaching? (like losing my dignity to be funny for them and make a point) How about servanthood - wouldn't the proper attitudes be an integral part of the gift? (like putting others needs first, not desiring recognition) I also stayed with a kids minister - her explanation of how she views her gift does make sense to me - she says that she has the gift of being a servant, and expresses that in different ways like teaching, hospitality, etc. according to what needs to be done, without neccessarily having a 'gift of the spirit' for teaching, or hospitality... but is that a gift or an obedient christ-like heart? By the way, are we all called to be servants? in that case, where does that leave the gifted-servants in relation to the normal guys? # Wednesday, September 18, 2002 ( 3:20 AM ) MaltaGirl Installed sitemeter (counter) and yaccs (comments)... # ( 2:58 AM ) MaltaGirl Just getting over a post-trip depression... over there I was the centre of attention, and i loved it... here I'm just another person... waaaaah... # |
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